Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Maternal Instincts

Everytime my baby gets sick, my heart goes out to her. She's all helpless and unable to tell me in words where she's aching, and what's upsetting her. I can only guess and try to comfort her as best as I can. Salma had a fever on Sunday night, so I stayed in Monday to take care of her. She was so weak with no energy to play, she'd just lie down or nurse, or sleep. And I knew she wanted me to bring her everywhere I went. I wonder why our maternal instincts kick in when our babies are sick, but it's not so much for fathers? I'm quite surprised that my husband was oblivious to it all, and was not as concerned as I was about her being ill. For instance, their bodies don't automatically stay up at night to watch over a sick child. Why is that? He wondered why last night I was not able to sleep. I wonder if their paternal instincts start to wear off or something...
 
It's funny today too, because it's as if my maternal instincts were on overdrive... I usually bring my mobile phone to the lactation room so that I can achieve "let down" by staring at my baby's photos while I'm on the pump. And yesterday, I had taken a photo of her sleeping pitifully on her side, a photo of her at her "sickest" so to speak. This morning while I was in the lactation room, I chose to gaze at this very same photo, and without realising it, I was able to pump 4 oz in 15 minutes! It's as if looking at that photo of my baby being so helpless caused my body to pump out milk at top speed!
 
I could not sleep much last night because I was busy trying to keep her fever down. And now I feel awful that I'm at work instead of taking care of her. I don't think this dilemma ever ends for mothers. And maybe fathers only get in this mode if they are single parents. I really wish Dad would take up his share of the burden of caring for her when she's ill without having to be asked. I wish this for all moms out there! It would certainly help to take a load off my mind!
 
It's lunch time soon and I am very tired from lack of sleep. I think I'll take a nap and eat later? It's tough being a working mom. :(
 

2 comments:

  1. Hi..

    I jalan jalan Wani's blog...terserempak your blog plak...

    Don't worry to much...you'll get used to it!...nanti la anak you dah masuk 2 orang kepala you dah tak larat nak risau.(I ddon't know about Wani..tapi I have come to that stage!).because you will able to tell which one is serious and which one is not (those that will go away in 1-2 days time)..The same thing happened to me last 3 years...but now alhamdulillah...I know how to handle it better.

    About the father...try to get him involve as much as you can...macam feed the baby ker...or changing the diapers ker.. start small..biasala orang lelaki...tak sama...generally all guys are the same la. Tapi they can change. Just takes time kuttt... =)

    And congratulations for still bf!!..lucky Salma... I failed for my first time, I managed to bf the 2nd one for 6 mths and I'll try harder for our latest insyallah in August.

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  2. Zek Zek... zakiah??
    you and ykc made me feel so much better!! i thought i was the only mom out there feeling frustrated at daddy's lack of paternal instincts! hehe. i guess they are just made differently from us huh?
    as for the breastfeeding, thanks! aiming to bf her until at least 1 years old, but my doc trying to push me to try until 2 years... tgk la mcm mane... when they start to have teeth must be painful... now she is teething, she always bites me, and i will scold her, but she just laughs at me. eeesh cheeky nye.

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